Tag Archives: david wygant

The Best Year of My Life (part 3)

“If you’re walking down the right path and you’re willing to keep walking, eventually you’ll make progress.” – Barack Obama

First, some thoughts about yesterday.

Yesterday was a historic moment in our nation’s history. While I don’t think Barack Obama will the savior that many people are looking for, I do think that he will be a more effective president than the man we had in office for the past eight years.

Furthermore, it is hard to ignore the symbolic value of Barack’s presidency-he has broken down what might be considered the final color barrier for minorities in America. Does that mean he has single handedly ended racism? No, racism or discrimination for that matter will always exist in a ego-fueled society. Barack Obama has pereservered in spite these barriers. I think that is very powerful and inspiring.

I am disheartened when I hear or read about people who say that they could care less about what happened. Yesterday was one of the most remarkable events of our lifetime, whether you agree with the mans views or not. His middle name is “Hussein” for crying out loud. It goes to show, that no matter the odds, no matter the, if you have the will, YOU WILL SUCCEED.

David Wygant has a very inspiring video related to yesterdays inauguration:

Onto the goals update.

Without further ado:

I realized yesterday that in following my New Deal Plan, it makes more sense to have daily, weekly, and overall goals. I am going to list my weekly goals here at the beginning of every week.

– Find a new job – It looks like the job that I thought I had gotten has fallen through.
– Finish song.

Overall goals:

1. Write on this blog everyday

21 days and counting, no stops. There have been a few close calls, but honestly I really like writing this blog everyday. It is therapeutic, and helps me get my thoughts in order.

2. Cut down on watching porn

I am surprised that this is going so well. I have cut down IMMENSELY on my porn watching, and have even skipped days. Having women in my life helps cut down on this a lot. Also, I have made watching porn much more of a ritual-I watch one full scene, and practice my Stalin technique throughout. It is much more of a practice of restraint than pleasure.

3. Meditate Everyday

I am on a once a week average with meditation. I meditated yesterday but was interrupted by my Father calling, I actually thought it was the alarm sounding to end the session. Tonight, I plan to return to the zendo depending on when my date with the redhead is. I will probably miss out on the Transmission of Light reading, but I am not sure that I get much out of these readings.

4. Exercise/Eat healthy

The Hamburger Helper is gone, so my eating is a lot healthier. I have been splurging on KFC every Sunday, but I think that will end once football is over. This morning I had a chicken salad, which is probably what I will also have for dinner.

I have to save the money for the gym membership because I am now unemployed. Although, a few pushups and sit ups to start my day wouldn’t be bad.

I need to come up with a morning routine!

5. Apply for new job/Graduate School

Applying for new jobs is now a necessity since I am unemployed and have no money saved. I made a rash decision to quit my job and am now dealing with the consequences. I made an appointment with a temp agency for Monday, but what I’ve been doing for the past couple of years.

I am going to start working on grad. school apps starting today.

6. Meet More Women

I fell off pretty bad this weekend. Thursday I didn’t do anything, Friday I was embarassed by the redhead, Saturday I didn’t do anything, and even on Sunday I was introverted. I am in a slump right now. Too much inside my head.

This weekend will be different, mainly because I will be cutting down on the alcohol since I am now broke. But I will also be returning to the top 40 clubs, which I haven’t really gone to since the fall started. I am just going to have to step up, be a man, and not be outcome dependent.

7. Learn How to Drive

Going out to practice with Hero in about an hour or so. Will schedule test in the next week or two. Since I am unemployed, there is daylight, which means there is time to practice!

8. Finish Rap Album

I finished a verse yesterday, I just have to fix it up. A good hour a day or so will help. I really enjoy writing, it’s stupid that I don’t do it more often!

9. Better Management of $$$

This has me pretty nervous right now. I have no steady stream of income coming in as of today (my last paycheck was received). I have enough to pay my bills and enough food to last until the middle of next month, but my social life will suffer dearly. I am confident I can whether this storm and make better decisions in the future.

Advertisements

LJBF means “Let’s Just Be Friends”

“You know… I don’t think my father would approve of me dating the undead, and you’re probably too nice a zombie-pirate for me anyway. Let’s just be friends instead.” – Elaine Barley in The Curse of Monkey Island

I went out last night.

My roommate, his ex-girlfriend and I went to see Notorious. A good, but not great, movie. I love this quote that Diddy says to B.I.G:

“In order to change the world, we have to change ourselves.”

Indeed.

On the way home, my roommate dropped me off at the bar where I met up with PartyGirl and PghGirl.

Party, Pgh and I were a team this past summer. We worked together, ate lunch together and went to the bar together. This past fall, Party and I found new jobs and everyone drifted apart. These two can be fun to hang out with, they are a refeshing change from the majority of my friends, because they are not intellectuals and don’t go to hipster events. They are attractive, girly girls that like to dress up and go to the club.

It was $1 Taco night at the bar we were at and I ate four. We were at the bar basically alone so there were no girls to talk to. Instead, I just caught up with those two, whom I hadn’t talked to in a long time. As we were leaving, the girl that PartyGirl’s boyfriend sees on the side walked into the bar. PartyGirl is a really melodramatic person and started freaking out. I found the whole situation funny, nothing happened, though.

I caught a ride with PghGirl as we moved onto a more ritzy bar where PartyGirl’s boyfriend was spinning. It was pretty empty there, too. It was a Monday night, after all. Nothing too eventful happened as we didn’t stay long. I was back home by 12:30am.

Both girls had this revelation about me, they said that I am much nicer and relaxed now because I am getting laid. I have a more positive demeanor than usual. This was funny, because I’m not getting laid right now, but I guess the prospect of having ladies in my life when there usually are none puts me in a much more positive mood.

I had been texting the redhead throughout the whole night. We had patched things up after the debacle on Friday when she was out of control. She thinks that a guy spiked her drink that night and that’s why she acted so erratically. While I certainly won’t rule out of the possiblity of her drink being spiked, I often think that girls use that as a cop out because they can’t hold their liquor. I don’t know redhead all too well though, so a spiked drink may have very well been the case.

During our texting, I have been trying to build things up sexually, but it’s not working. After Friday’s debacle, and me ignoring her on Saturday, something was lost between her and I. It seems much more like a friendship than two people who want to get together and fuck. I don’t know what to do about it. This always happens to me!

Part of me wants to place her down in my priority list, keep her as a friend, if she wants to hang out, then fine. There are sooo many other girls out there. The other part of me wants to get real aggressive and give her an ultimatum, either we start taking things sexually, or we stop talking altogether.

I know that the latter option is not me right now. I am just not that forthright and would begin to feel guilty if things went bad. Remember how I said I wasn’t talking to her after Friday night for awhile? Well I got drunk on Saturday night and started texting her again.

There was another girl I met two months ago where the same thing happened. I took HipsterGirl home the same night I met her at the bar, but unfortunately my penis decided to go into hibernation. We have remained in the friends zone ever since. On New Years eve, she was part of the drunk texting rampage that I went on, but thought all of the messages I sent were funny. I invited HipsterGirl to an MLK day event yesterday, but she declined because she didn’t want to take the bus with me.

So, when I do get up the courage to meet girls, I am STILL not aggressive enough and get thrown into the friends zone. Do you see how much a lack of self-confidence can hamper success in a person’s life? This is all very frustrating, to know what I have to do, but still not do it, just because of my brain.

Or as David Wygant put it so eloquently:

You have no physical handicaps. You have only mental handicaps. You are allowing a weak mind – and your fears and insecurities – to dominate your life. You’re not willing to communicate with people because you’re not willing to push yourself the extra distance.

Geez. that cuts right to the bone. I am going to have to write that somewhere so it’ll be the first thing I see when I wake up in the morning.

Right now, if I were to rate how I treat myself on a scale of 1 to a million bucks, I think $50 would be accurate right now. This needs to STOP and it’s frustrating because I am not sure that I know how!

Since I went out last night, no goals update today, but there will be tomorrow.

Relax, it’s cool.

“When you change the way you look at things the things you look at change.” – Wayne Dyer

Today, David Wygant posted a blog about thanking the universe.  He asks:

“For what are all of you thankful every day? Do you wake up feeling positive? Do you wake up really embracing life? Do you wake up thanking the universe? If you do, amazing things will happen to you every single day.”

This morning, the answer to all of these questions was “no.” In fact, I loathed getting out my bed only to walk around my cold apartment and get ready for a job that I did not want to go to.

I went to work and found myself in a negative mood, staring at the computer screen, my depression killing my motivation. The work was too monotonous, the pay was way too low, and my boss was a snake. I sulked for a good hour.

After awhile, I remembered that I have two options to get out of a negative situation. I can…

Accept the situation fully.

or

Get out of the situation completely.

So, I quit my job.

Well, I gave my two weeks notice.

Do I have another job lined up? I think I do, but it’s not for sure. I’ve talked about the job a couple of times on this blog. If I don’t, I’ll just go back to the temp. agency and get another job. Life is too short to be dealing with bullshit like the Bank.

Once I sent out my letter of resignation, it was like a load had been lifted off of my shoulders. All of the sudden I was smiling and jovial. I had solved a major source of strife in my life!

But there was still a question that Mr. Wygant asked that I haven’t answered.

For what are all of you thankful every day?

I am thankful that I am able to make decisions like the one I made today. I am not in the best financial situation, but I am able to live on very little money. Also, I can find temporary jobs pretty quickly with my computer skills.

However, I don’t expect the situation to come to that. I am going to get the job I interviewed for.

At one point during the morning, when I was really sulking-I mean really on the brink of having a breakdown, I had this daydream. I was standing on sidewalk, looking across a two way street to the opposite sidewalk, and beyond that on a building wall was a sign that read:

Relax, it’s cool.

I smiled and calmed down a bit. When put into perspective, my job wasn’t that bad, and even still, I always had the option of quitting, which is exactly what I did. Oftentimes, I find myself freaking out about shit that really DOES NOT MATTER. Take the past two years of approach anxiety, for instance.

Tomorrow I have a date.

It’s with the redhead I met on Saturday. I hadn’t texted her since Sunday but she seemed receptive when I messaged her tonight. It went something like this:

Me: What are we doing tomorrow?

Her: We have plans for tomorrow?

Me: Of course we do. We’re going to wine night.

Her: Yeah? That sounds like fun what time…

It went on from there…

I am pretty proud of the interaction, I portrayed myself as confident and to the point. I stated my intent, “I want to go out with you,” right from the beginning. I didn’t beat around the bush, I didn’t ask her any questions, I basically held her hand.

My goal with the date tomorrow is to have as much fun as possible. The redhead, she seems pretty laid back and cool, so. Plus, there will be wine involved, so any nervousness that she or I might have will be eliminated soon enough through drunkeness.

I’ll let you guys know how it goes in one or two posts from now.

In the meantime, be sure to check out David Wygant’s blog. The guy, according to PUA Thundercat, is as close to Hitch as it gets in the community. He targets the older crowd of gentlemen and up until recently, he has eschewed bootcamps for more personal one on one help. He also helps women find men.  His blog is filled with not just PUA tips, but also philosophical insights, which are very much in alignment with my own views. He updates his blog daily, so be sure to check him out.