Tag Archives: LeaderGirl


“We can all be heroes in our virtues, in our homes, in our lives.” – James Ellis

So I went back to the bar I was at last Thursday. Why? Because I thought TeacherGirl would be there! I wanted to clear up any shit that might have been caused by King Lear. I also wanted to figure out if I had gotten a wrong number.

Yes, I know this was a stupid stupid idea. If she gave me a bad number, so what? MOVE ON! However, it perplexes me that she would do such a thing, I feel like I hit it off with her pretty well, and maybe she just dialed it wrong.

She wasn’t there tonight.

I’ll see her again, it’s Pittsburgh, but if I don’t, oh well. Next week, I might go back to 80’s night and see LeaderGirl. The only reason I didn’t go to see LeaderGirl tonight was because I had no cash on hand, and I risked overdrafting at the bar I went to tonight.

King Lear decided not to go tonight, which was one of the rare times I’ve been at this bar without him. I was messaging the dude desperately wanting him to come out because I didn’t want to go out alone. In the end, it wasn’t a big deal. There were no real targets at the bar, and really only his ex-girlfriend hit on me pretty aggressively, but I’m not interested in her at all. Not to say that she isn’t attractive because she is, but she went out with my good friend to the point that she LIVED with him, that is NOT a good idea by any definition of the word!

If anything, I should have gotten at Hero, who was undoubtedly out tonight. Shit, he goes out any night he’s not working. He doesn’t drink anything but water, and goes out with the sole purpose of picking up women, he is a TRUE PUA.

The problem with Hero is that I usually feel uncomfortable when I go out with him. If the place is not up to his standards of girls, and 9/10 times it isn’t, then we have to leave. Most times I do agree with him, there are not enough girls to faciliate opening, but there is definitely work to be done, and oftentimes, we still stand there and do nothing.

Still, sometimes I just want to chill, get comfortable, and see what happens. He doesn’t drink so this is not an option for him. He is die hard. I admire him for this, I really do. If PUA was an army, he’d be first infantry, right there out on the front lines blasting at whomever, not giving a fuck if he died.

I realize that sitting and chilling is not conducive to PUA, and I think that in some ways I am not cut out to be one. Ultimately, all I really want to do is to be able to talk to females and elicit attraction more often than not. I want to get in touch with my core masculine identity and have a consistent roster of girls that I can get in touch with. A byproduct of this is that I will be able to talk to males and females that I’m not interested in.

Hero thinks this is stupid, he is not trying to befriend guys or ugly girls, he is just trying to fuck hot chicks. Sometimes I think that goes against him, because I feel like there is this weird aura that goes around him, that says, “fuck you, I only want your hot chicks!” Whereas with me, I say, “hey if you’re a cool and don’t smell, we can chill and talk, no problem. If you have hot girls around you though, I MUST talk to them.” I don’t make PUA the end all be all of a night, I just try to have the most fun I think that I can possibly have, and sometimes that is after only talking to maybe one girl.

By the way, I’m not trying to paint Hero as a villain or anything, I am just trying demonstrate how our minds our different in the way we go about things. We started PUA at the same time, and by far he has had the most succeess, no disputing that. Still, I feel that I have to have my own journey, as he has to have HIS own journey.

Hero is actually planning to move to Vegas, which is an idea I planned two years ago. He wants to go there for strictly PUA. Jeffy from RSD says that there is no better place on Earth to open women. My idea was to go there just because I think it would be a unique experience-I don’t think you could anywhere in the world that would be like Las Vegas. At first, I’ll admit, I was jealous and tried to discourage him from making this decision, but shortly into the conversation, I realized my wrongdoing and began encouraging him to make this move in his life.

Seriously, I wish him the best of luck, but Hero is so smart I’m sure he won’t have much of a problem. In a way, I am sad because if he’s gone, and Roommate and Crafton don’t really go out anymore, and King Lear is out of commission most nights because he has a girlfriend, then that means I will be going out solo a lot this summer.

Maybe this will be the kick in the butt that I need!

All in all, GREAT times ahead, my friends!


Inactive for Super Bowl Weekend

“It is better to do the wrong thing than to do nothing.” – Winston Churchill


The Super Bowl was crazy.

EVERYTHING was discombobulated because of Super Bowl weekend, which I shouldn’t have let happen, but it did. Better planning is needed.

Let’s start at Thursday:

I went to 80’s night, which I went to by myself. Hero, Spy, and their friend Voodoo who I hadn’t seen in forever showed up later in the evening.

I spent most of the night talking to LeaderGirl, while Hero hollered at her friend, HippieGirl, which he had much more success with than I did. By much more success, I mea he was making out with her on the bench, even as LeaderGirl was like, “no you guys shouldn’t be making out.”

I eventually decided to stop being a pussy and got Leader’s number, but not before she went off and hollered at the bartender later in the night. I texted her a couple times over the weekend, but got no response. I deleted her number from my phone this morning.

Went to after hours and caught up with the old crew. We were pretty much the only people there.


Went to the bar with King Lear, but not until late in the night, around midnight.

Somehow, in those two hours, I got wasted drunk, but still hobbled on over to after hours, with Slim, an old friend who was visiting. He started talking to a friend of mine, and I started talking to her friend. I was pretty wasted drunk, but I was still functioning somehow. At some point I blacked out, I didn’t get the girls number, my friends were gone, and the place was closing.

The next Slim said she was pretty homely looking. I checked her out on Facebook only to concur from her main pic, but she looked alright when done up. I befriended her, but haven’t said anything to her, I am still undecided whether I will pursue or not.

Actually, decision made: I won’t. Well, unless I see her in public again.


I was pretty tired from the previous night, but I still went rollerskating. Well, before that I went out for my friends birthday at some vegetarian restaurant. The food sucked. There were some hot girls there, but I was seated at the table with only my friend and the Puerto Rican girl he is seeing now.

I took the bus home, then headed over to rollerskate. I wasn’t in a great mood, and it took me FOREVER to get my skates on. I was inside my head the whole night and basically just watched Slim get his holler on.

PartyGirl and her friends came through later in the night and we hung out, but for the most part this wasn’t a very notable night. Some girl stole the pick out of my hair, but I didn’t find her very attractive, so I wasn’t very amused.

For the third night in a row, I went to after hours.


Slim spent the night and we woke up pretty early because we drank a lot of Sparks and were still really wired once the alcohol wore off. Unable to sleep, we watched about half of Casablanca until we tried to sleep again. Later in the day, we linked up with Roommate and went to the bar to catch the Super Bowl.

Nothing notable happened here. There were some really hot girls, but mostly I just watched Slim do his thing. The game was great, but now that I am sitting here and reflecting on the game, it could have been much better.

I don’t know what happened this weekend. All I have to show for it is a less fat-wallet and a few okay nights to opine about. That it, no more drinking until I open at least one set of girls. I mean seriously, at the end of the day, drinking is a very empty activity. Drinking, by itself, doesn’t necessarily equal happiness or even fun. It can ADD ON to fun in certain situations, but many times it doesn’t or even worse, leads to very negative encounters.

I am really PISSED at myself after writing this. I am going to go HARD this coming week!

I am He-Man

“If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life. With confidence, you have won before you have started.” – Marcus Tullius Cicero

I woke up yesterday and I did not meditate. I always come up with some excuse, usually it’s I need food or the fact that I simply want to surf the internet for awhile first. I’ll make up for it by meditating before I go out for the evening. It’s good to get a half hour of silence before entering the sensation overwhelming atmosphere of a bar.

Yesterday was new years day.

I was pretty tired from the night before, but I had determined to go out early in the day. Around 9 p.m., my friend canceled on me, and my motivation dropped, but I said to myself, “no, you ARE going out.” I get anxious and discouraged at the thought of going out alone, but I generally end up having a great time. Going out alone FORCES me to be more social.

I walk down to the local dive bar where it’s eighties night. Lots of lovely hipsters and gutter punk females fill the place, dancing to a lot of songs I have never heard before. I grab a beer (can’t beat $1 Pabst pounders) and post up.

After a little while, I come to the conclusion that I am too afraid to approach anyone, so I go back to the bar and sit down. A few girls sit beside me while they are getting drinks and I talk to them, but nothing out of consequence comes out of these encounters.

I go back out to the dance floor and start dancing by myself. The DJ starts playing a hip hop set and I start to really get into it. I grab this girl and we start dancing. This girl, let’s call her LeaderGirl, has another friend who is much hotter than her and dressed much nicer. In fact, they both looked out of place at the bar because they were dressed more for the club rather than a hipster night. Not that I am complaining…

The other girl is dancing with this guy she says she doesn’t want to dance with anymore. Still, later on in the night, they disappear to go someplace where presumably they are making out. Leader and I continue to be the only ones grinding (read: simulated sex) on the dance floor. I held back on trying to make out with her, which I should have done, but I didn’t set that sexual tone. Meanwhile, the other guy, who can’t dance and is as plain looking as anything, is making out with the hotter girl. Sigh…

There was another cute girl with a mullet eyeing me up all night. I’m sure I had talked to her before, but I can’t remember where. I was preoccupied with Leader, so I didn’t talk to her… but I should have. Lastly, there was a girl, maybe the hottest girl in the bar that night (long legs and heels, oh my), who came up and touched my hair, I told her that costs “two dollars, please,” but didn’t follow from there. She was with my one friend, so I didn’t pursue, although I can’t say I would have if I did.

Lastly, Leader and I parted ways at the end of the night. She pleaded with me to show up next week, telling me what a good dancer I am (that’s a first). I guess next week is the 80’s night marathon where they’ll be open till like noon. I told her I’d think about going, but I’ll probably show up, sounds like a unique experience.

On my way home, I got the idea that I should start calling myself “He-Man.” He is a muscular guy that gets the princess and wields a big ass sword. I think I can go really overboard with this: I’ll start watching He-Man episodes before I go out and yell “I HAVE THE POWER!” whenever I feel really self-conscious.


Immediate goals:

– Meditate to start the day.

– Make plan for rap album, start writing.

– Step out of comfort zone by…

– Opening once I enter the bar. This will set a social pace for the whole evening.

– Being more aggressive.

– No could have’s or should have’s for tomorrow, only I did’s.

Administrative notes: I am going to add some of my older posts which I deleted awhile ago over the weekend. I’m going to edit the timestamp, so I’m not sure if they’ll show up on your reader or not. I don’t know why I deleted them, I guess I didn’t want to stare my past failures in the face all of the time.